I would say that I'm as broke as a joke...

But you have to give credit to a good joke. I'm so poor I have to couch scavenge for enough money for gas to get to work tomorrow. I'm so poor your mama said "Damn, he more poorer 'n my grammar". But friday comes soon and with it the boon of a paycheck. I can eat drink and be merry 'pon that beautiful day.